Pity Party alert....oh lord...what a day....good and bad. Big achievements that no one would notice, small failures that stick out like a mutt in a poodle parlor, and of course EVERYONE sees. So, I decided to take cha'cote to the lesson and playday, figure I could just hang out with him while I am giving a lesson. Some undemanding time. Oh boy....the success was that he ripped around, running like a fool. It was so nice to see this quiet introvert cut loose with the boys. Sure he was terrified to his very core at first....but they quickly learned they would never be able to sniff him, if he keeps running away from them. So they started mosying up nice and slow. In the end, Cha'cote was the one instigating PLAY with them. He even stopped off to see me everynow and then and hang out with me of his own accord. Can everyone see my heart melting?? We played a little on line. He got in the trailer OK to get there, not bad...not even 5 min.....My student made HUGE progress in the posting dept today....I was so proud of her
Jaws music inserted here.....
Time to get back in the trailer. Now since we are having problems, this was not much of a failure....but with all eyes on me....I got nervous, and so did he.....I should have asked them to take thier chatter far, far away. But....my puny ego thought that would look bad or mean, or that in and of itself would make me some kind of failure.....so.....half hour or so of sheer tortuous patience....he got in. For the first time I enlisted help from my student, for more than just closing the door. I have to say, she knows me well enough, that we were almost working as one mind. She did a great job, of watching when I release, so she could release too. So that was a cool partnership and a success as well. But I drove off with my heart sunk low, feeling like the worst of all failures.....Pity Party.......everybody dance now!
Do you know that lil shit, got in the trailer 20+ when we got home! I think I am gonna have to find some help with this.....I am tired of banging my head on a wall with this and I just don't know how to help him. I have some ideas for this week......or next weekend. but the moral of the story.....who am i kidding, I don't know the moral of the story.....My student and I talked for about an hour, while I cried......she is such a good ass kisser! But really, she reminded me of all my success this year with Cha'cote, the success' I have helped her with, and that feeling good about your self when you are successful is not egotistical, and feeling sad when you fail miserably is not self loathing......I guess there is a moral here.....it is ok to go there....just not ok to live there!
Savvy On
Michelle
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I don't think your trailer loading was a failure at all. You were patient and you stuck to your principles and the horse got on. I think you handled it well. You were a great example of how to handle things when they don't always go exactly as planned. Your horse's dignity is in tact and at the end of the day that is what counts. He got on 20 times at home because of the time you took at your student's.
ReplyDeleteNatalie
Aww...thanks natalie....sometimes when i fail him, it is hard to remember that I am the first human in his life that didn't fail him. I am giving him a great life, and so what if he can't get in the trailer...I will just lead him to the vet! Seriously, he needs to be able to get in, for the emergency part...but...
ReplyDeletethose watching said they wouldn't have been that patient, and of course asking me why dont I do x,y,z....even asked why i wasn't doing it the parelli way.....but since they dont do parelli, dont realize that it isn't about the technique, rather th relationship. there was too much going on and he needed his hand held...I got in the trailer, as often, he needs porqupine from the front, rather than driving from behind. even my student was shocked at my patience.....truth be told, no one more than I! but it does have to get better than this...I still don't like how we are doing it....gotta figure something else out!