Rules, Restrictions, Guidelines ……where’s the fun?

Since when did I become an adult? I was in the pool with my son the other day, and of course as all 11yo kids will do…..we had to have rules for who wins the game of, don’t fall off the raft while squirting each other with water guns. It was a short list, and true to history repeating itself, as soon as my son lost, the rules changed. Some how, if you fell off of your raft, but managed to keep any part of your body ON the raft, you didn’t lose and it was immediate grounds for the all important re-do. I knocked that kid off a number of times, while managing not to fall of my self (something I needed no help in doing) and each time, my son whipped out the fine print, and alerted me to yet another rule that kept me from claiming my well earned championship. Kids are so flexible, and quickly find a way to win, or at least not lose. So why can’t adults?


I spoke to Maggie today, no time for lesson on Sunday, BUT she was kind enough to talk me through a number of things I could do to bring back the fun. Like I said the other day, it was a foreign word, but with her translation, I felt like a moron for not seeing it myself. Sometimes, the obvious solution goes completely un-noticed. She gave me ideas and concepts and real tangible blue print. Nothing I have never heard before, in-fact I have heard it a 1000 times. Just like when I had all that trouble getting Snookie in the trailer. Over 100hrs I put into it, ultimately paid $500 for Ann Kiser to get her in the trailer in 5min flat. Of course it was the most important 5 min of my horse journey to date. I wasn’t doing anything wrong, I just wasn’t doing it right. I think today was another pivotal moment. Anything that she said that I had heard before, no matter how basic low level the concept, I didn’t get defensive and say, “well I know that”. I stayed open to her interpretation of concept, because I knew I was missing some crucial ingredient in the formula, and you never know what it is, so you better listen with all your ears, heart, mind and soul. I saw fun through her eyes, and thus was able to see it through my horses eyes. On many levels, I am irritated at my self for missing it. In fact I say some of it myself all the time, and yet it is so easy to apply a technique or concept at the wrong time, or completely forget it all together.

I feel like I have seen the light. And I feel like it is all right at my fingertips now. I have hope. I have been reviewing my footage of my auditions and practice sessions, and looking at those of others. Of course we all compare ourselves to others and feel we don’t measure up. But honestly I haven’t been. I see other L3/4 students and admire so much about them, and remember how I used to look that good too. Yet I couldn’t put my finger on the missing ingredient. The ingredient that makes the difference between a person with a horse and a horseperson. The star factor. The it factor. The ability to go from playing a game with your horse and winning the game with your horse, and still have your horse feel like a winner. The ability to change the rules, go with the flow, make it up as you, and not get stuck in a battle. Rather than find a way to be flexible, I was battling, giving her something to brace against, and tucking my tail between my legs, and running away feeling like a failure. I will take her advice, and go home and play with my horse. I will converse with her, rather than brace against her, and tonight she will write the play, then and only then, I will direct it. I will let you know how it goes.

Savvy On

Michelle