Testing...testing...1..2..3

I figured now that I have Snookie going and following a good evening habit, it was time to drop the excuses and get back to L2 online. Snookie can't handle Rose leaving her, and vice versa. I have been doing hill therapy in the pasture and then taking Snookie out to eat next to the fence. I had to think about how I was going to get Rose out without snookie and without the others eating Snookies food. So I figured take Rose out and let Snookie and spirtit graze while we played. Then put Rose up and feed Snookie. Yet again Snookie blasted through the gate. I was none to thrilled. But that is a lesson for another day. I told myself, for motivation purposes, I would tape my L2 online every night till I was satisfied, even if it takes a month. That takes a little pressure off of me since I get huge anxiety at shows and while taping. I play Rose a while and try a "car"pod for the camera. It was too far away, so I asked my husband to tape me. The taping went well except for I hate the way I look...trying to put those issues aside...and Rose wanted to be very close to me a few times and I had to really put pressure on to get her to move out. We did all the compulsories and a few "show your stuff" stuff. Nothing too fancy. But my husband started whining about the barbecue being left alone and I got a bit stupid. Turns out it melted the knob off...oops. My big problem was after we were done and the logistics of feeding Snookie. She was loose and since I soak her food, there wasn't time for the "soak" with her digging through it. I will have to plan that out a little better or I will never move forward, All in all it was a good play session and we even learned something new. I watched the video, not pleased with my body or my general "flow" but at least I know what I am dealing with and can plan accordingly to dress different and what areas need to be fine tuned. I can say that I am happy I am keeping a diary of all this so I can look back at my growth thru this difficult time of dealing with the fear of failure and mostly I am being held accountable.