Waterhole Rituals ~BFO~ humans really can immitate nature!

So I have had some ramblings about the water hole rituals, and I had a HUGE BFO the other morning laying in bed.  You know?? One of those times half asleep and half lucid, where I think we may actually be able to tap into our sub-conscience, and have some seriously smart discussions with ourselves.  For all I know this may have been a dream, as the thoughts slipped away from me as I awoke and bustled around getting ready for work.  In my waking mind, the thought had bounced around my head, like a frantic hunk of metal in a pin ball machine.  I was unable to rein it back, into this BFO, until today.  This will be long, but please follow along......

So Snookie, the herd leader, really is only concerned with her second in command.  She bonds tightly, and cannot be parted from her friend, without serious injury to herself.  As a retired 27yo, I accomadate this for her to the best of my abilty.  Never taking her friend from her, without dragging her along as well.  I had rescued Tigerlily as a pasture mate for her, 10ys ago.  Snookie was new to being an alpha, and went overboard at times in her dominance.  Tigerlily, quickly figured out that it was easier to just do what she said, than get an ass whopin the size of texas.  About a month after I got Tigerlily, I left with Snook for a ride down the road, and Lily freaked, fell and sliced her butt open with a hoof.  I have no idea how she got a hoof that high, but she ended  up with a 14' gash on the point of her hip, near the vulva.  We stitched it up, and the next day, her leg was the size of a old oak tree.  I watched Snookie, gently urge her across the 100' paddock to the water tank, and splash water on her to get her to drink.  I was amazed at the power and influence of a leader, and also the wisdom and compasion a lead mare can have.  My herd grew over the years with rescues coming and going, and some staying.  Tigerlily was there to keep my sweet gal content, and she was never worried when anyone left the herd, as long as it wasn't her baby girl, Tigerlily.

Tigerlily had a disease, DSLD, that progressed to the point of having to put her down 2ys ago, at the tender age of 9yo.  We had to sedate Snookie as I knew, she would not be able to handle it.  She had the rest of the herd to keep her company, but she was heartbroken, and screamed for about a month.  Calling for her, and moping around.  You could see the sparkle was gone from her eye.  Rose is Lily's half sister, and although at first glance they were hard to tell apart, they couldn't look more different than Seabiscuit did from War Admiral.  Lily was 16.2 hands and somewhat resembled a mule.  She had a roman nose, thin whispy mane and huge floppy ears.  She was the clumbsiest but sweetest horse i ever did see.  Rose 15.3 looks like a spanish horse, enough curly mane for 3 horses, dished head and as nimble as a working cow horse, with an evil streak a mile long.  Snookie tried hard to get Rose to be her buddy during her mourning, but Rose would have no part of it.  I watched for the first year, Snookie treat her like she did Lily, demanding that Rose go here or there with her.  Sometimes she would, but then once there, she would walk off and leave Snookie alone.  Then Snook would chase after her and gather her up again, and the cycle would repeat it self all day long.  Poor Snookie got quite a bit of excersize that year, but was almost always an emotional wreck.  I havn't thought much of it this past year, as Rose seems to apease her most of the time now, and they seem to both be bonded to each other.  BUT, I just figured that Rose was the one to finally give in.  Well my BFO, says no.....that is not the case at all.  Caroyn Resnick is a master for sure......listen to this.....

So a few months ago, I was video taping Cha'Cote on his first day with the herd.  Since he was pretty boring just standing in one spot, I thought I would try to catch on camera, Rose giving her self her morning shower in the tank.  She is quite comical, as she dunks her head in up to her eyeballs, and blows bubbles, then proceeds to splash water on herself until she is satisfied with her work.  as I stood there and taped, I noticed something that has had me perplexed for a while, till now.  Snookie came up and moved Rose off the water.  nothing new there for an alpha, but I noticed she was not using her old MO.  Which used to include alot of ear pinning, biting and kicking if needed.  But what she did was wait for Rose to take her lips out of the water, then took her drinking spot.  Then laid her head on Rose's neck and just waited.  Rose made several attempts to finish drinking and get in a shower, but Snookie patiently kept putting her head in her way, until Rose finally gave up and left and went back to the food as Snookie wanted.  For the last couple of months, I thought maybe Snookie was losing status and Rose was moving on up.  But, at a play day, I noticed Rose was COVERED in bite and kick marks. Hmmm, i think rather ROSE thinks she is moving up sometimes, but clearly not.  She has not been yielding to Snookie and suffering the consequences for sure.

So it has taken me a couple of weeks since getting Carolyns dvd's, but I finally figured it out.  Snookie is doing just as Carolyn describes, she has to court her herd, as well as them court her.  They will not follow her, if they hate her.  Rose did not respond to the leadership style that Tigerlily did, and thus caused Snookie to have to do things differently to get her way.  I cannot remember the last time she was rude to Rose, or chased her off the food, and infact, they eat closer than Snookie and Lily ever did.  Dang near nostril to nostril from the get go.  I know she is still leader, as I never see her yield to anyone, any time, for any reason.  Follow like a loon if they leave, but retreat from....NO!

So, at the moment, my BFO is just that, a blinding flash of the obvious.....but how to interpret this to my advantage with Rose is another matter.  Clearly the 7 dominance games were not only no longer yielding me respect, just the opposite.  I believe it is infact secret door game #8....the water hole ritutuals game that ONLY the leader plays......taking territory and eye contact......

Clearly, Snookie found a better way to improve her relationship with Rose, and cause Rose to WANT to be with her.  I need to pay close attention to how and what Snookie does, and how she does it.  She knows Rose better than I.  She always had her respect, but now she has her heart too.  And I should be nothing more than ashamed at myself, for not seeing this sooner.

Savvy On
Michelle