Friday, February 10, 2012
A day in the mind of "ME"
By that point I had gotten a paper route at age 10 to pay for riding lessons, and the summer before I turned 13, was the last to be spent at her ranch. I had seen the alternate Olympics in 1980 and decided to ride English from then on, and also aspired to become “Rookie of the Year” in show jumping. And of course I dreamed of going to the Olympics, like many other young girls do.
I often think back to that little girl, in her room drifting off to sleep, dreaming of horses. Horse pictures plastered all over her wall, doodles of horses on all her school books. Driving with her mom thru the country side, fantasizing about galloping alongside the car on a horse. During recess pretending to be a horse, cantering thru the school yard, whinnying and snorting and being made fun of, while other girls were already worrying about make up and what to wear. She dreamed of black stallions and flaxen maned horses……hoping that someday, she could have a horse of her own. I wish I could speak to that little girl and whisper in her ear as she drifts off to sleep, not to worry, someday you will own a black horse and ride it bridle-less. Some day you will befriend a wild horse with a flaxen mane and he will trust you like he trusts no other human. Someday you will know way more about horses than you could ever possibly imagine. Close your eyes sweet heart and dream to your hearts content, not all of your dreams will come true….but this one that you dream tonight WILL come true, and some day you will have more horses than you know what to do with. Someday your life with horses will be better than you could ever hope to dream. Close your eyes now sweet heart, you only have to wait a little while longer.
Deep in my heart, I know that if the little girl could visit me now, she would love to slap the ever loving tar out of me and tell me...
Stop whining about what you don’t have, what you can’t do or what you have lost with age. Look out your back window, look all around you. You are not an OLD woman YET. Can’t you see you are living my dream? So… Live it …..PLEASE, for me. Please don’t let my dream die because it is getting too hard for you…you wimp. Who cares if your crazy, insane, or single minded……so am I. You are me, so keep living our dream please.